Reflection : Meaning and Purpose that matters to me (MPM2M)

What is something 'larger than yourself' to which you feel connected and that provides you with meaning and purpose in your life?

Heard of Dr. Duckworth's research on "Positive Psychology – Character, Grit & Research Methods"?

Think of an example of something for which you feel/felt or an everyday sort of significant achievement, accomplishment or mastery that you experience, e.g. checking off most of the items on your daily to-do list. In your opinion, how do these compare in how they contribute to your well-being?

28th week of Pregnancy #2

6nov-12nov

Wed
Hubby made western food for dinner. Hubby fetched TK and sent Marmy some instructions via SMS to make dinner, which Marmy didn't follow.

Thur
Bought some cooked vegetables and made porridge for lunch. Plan to clear some more stuff at Grannies this weekend to make more room. Are there any things to prepare for the lil one's arrival?

Fri
TK Uncle R birthday. Going for gynae appointment after sending TK to Childcare. Waited and pass when it was my turn. Grandpa came with Hubby. Found out the radiation at Sim Lim Square is very strong at the top level. Dark clouds in the sky on the way to fetch TK. Hubby bought new black shoes and sandals for SGD62. Good bargain. Bought some rice for TK to eat at coffeeshop before going to Granddad's for dinner. News on TV2, Malaysia: It's great to be Singap****n t*day! PM official website was hacked. TK sent Papa smiley face and a rose via SMS and asked, 'kai xin ma?' Hubby made po chai mee for supper.

Sat
TK went for story-telling session at NLB at 11a, followed by lunch at nearby coffee shop at 1230p.

Mon
Hubby went swimming. Found a stall called Little Gingerbread Boy selling muffins (2-3 flavours daily) at SGD1 and cupcakes at SGD2 (special design a little more expensive) which has been in business since January 2013. Maybe can order some for future family celebration. TK loved the muffins too. Heard that there's a confectionery shop selling vegetarian eggless cakes at Blk 4 Joo Seng Road/Upper Aljunied Road. TK wet pants in class again. TK sent flying kisses via SMS to Papa saying 'wo ai ni ba ba'. Warmed porridge for Hubby as supper.

Organising the first birthday party

Your baby’s birthday is a very special occasion. It’s more of an event for mum and dad than it is for baby (as baby probably didn't understand yet). No matter how big or small your celebration, it helps to think about it early. There is much less stress involved with some pre-planning.

There are a few things you need to decide on:

• Invitations (relatives, friends, colleagues etc depending on how 'large scale' you want it to be)
• Venue (depend on your budget and the availability and accessibility of the place)
• Food, drinks and the all important cake (have kids' meals provided but exclude the sandwiches as they may be too occupied with all the fun to take the staple food)
• Decorations (balloons are the all time favourite)
• Party games and activities for all your guests (if there're other 'young guests' you might want to cater to their needs such as having a baby gym room where they can be kept occupied playing and having fun)
• Others (fun pack for the 'young guests' to take home and photographer or videographer to capture the memorable moments)

How to choose the right Safety Gate and some Tips

How to choose the right safety gate?

Some Features To consider

• One-hand release allows you to open and lock a gate with one hand especially when you are carrying a baby (and that is sure to be often)
• Dual-direction swinging allows you to open the safety gate in either direction (non-stair applications only)
• Expandable safety gates can fit doorways and openings of different sizes
• See-through safety gates allow you full vision of baby
• Installation kits help in mounting safety gates on various surfaces
• Extension kits allow gates to expand to fit openings larger than standard-size doorways and windows
• Safety gates come in various materials that complement any décor--wooden, plastic-coated steel, and soft mesh

Must know Safety Tips

• DO NOT install pressure-mounted safety gates at the top of stairways, as they cannot withstand as much pressure as wall-mounted safety gates
• DO NOT purchase baby safety gates constructed with wide mesh screens patterns larger than 1 square inch.
• DO NOT purchase accordian - style child safety gates as they pose finger pinching hazards as well as a climbing ladder in the closed position
• Discontinue using safety gates when your child is 36 inches tall or is 2 years old. A safety gate should never be less than three quarters of your child's height
• Always install pressure gates with the lock release on the opposite side you are protecting

Tips for Ordering Tze Char at Coffeshop

1. Ratio. Order dishes with 2-for-3 ratio (2 dishes for 3 person). For example, for a family of 4-5 adults, you may order a total of 3 dishes. 

NEVER order 4 dishes to minimize food wastage when 2 out of the 4 adults are senior citizens or over 50 years old and all are small-eaters.

2. Size. The dishes come in Small, Medium and Large. Mention your preferred choice and remember to emphasize. For example, order all 3 Small dishes for a family of 4 adults.

Below are poor estimation and vice examples:

Scenario A: A stall at Blk 9* Lor 4 Toa Payoh will serve 4 Medium dishes for 5 adults by default
(2 Senior Citizens + 2 Females + 1 Male and all have small appetite)

Result: 1 dish veg luo han chai was left untouched.
Costs $44.50 but we were overcharged by $2 by the lady M**.

Scenario B: A stall at Blk 9* Lor 4 Toa Payoh will serve 9 dishes for 6 adults (all above 50 years old)

Many dishes unfinished and 3 selected dishes were packed for take-away.

3. Preference. Always remember to remind the person taking your order if you've any special preferences such as 2LNM (Less Salt. Less Oil. No MSG. More Greens).

*Advice provided by the Tow-kay of the Tze Char Stall in another post.

What to bring if child falls sick in the night

Before leaving the house, you need to
A. Grab your handbag with the following:

1. wallet with some cash, NRIC or identification card

2. Mobile phone fully charged and/or charger

3. Child's BC and health booklet

4. If paying medical fees by nets, bring CDA card (and remember PIN)

5. Child's diapers and bb wipes (if you don't want to be charged for using those provided by the hospital which are more costly)

6. child's bath towel or big blanket (it could be very cold at A&E and may be a long wait)

7. water bottle and some biscuits,nuts or bread (to keep you awake or 'stay alive')

8. Child's water bottle and milk bottle

9. a set of child's clothes
10. House keys

B. Bring along a sweater for yourself.

C. Bring along some plastic bags and tissue paper if child is feeling nauseous.

D. Note down the recordings/history of the child's discomfort


Upon arrival at the KKH Children A&E
A. Press for a 'Q' ticket on the right hand side upon entering the glass doors.
B. Wait for your no. to be called (4 partitioned-rooms in front of the seats)
C. Let the nurse know if your child has any known allergy after she checked the child's bp, heart rate and breathing (lungs) etc
D. Advance to the Registration/Payment counters to wait for your no. to be called.
E. Let the nurse know if your child has hospital insurance policy

What makes a #1 confinement lady

1. She's very organised, and upon arrival, she'd go about organising the kitchen..including the 'storeroom' and after settling bb and us..she goes abt checking out the nursery, and by day 2, more or less settled..

2. she's got the schedule for bb and mum all in her heart: 6.45am wake up, 7am make breakfast, boil my bath water, bathe bb, feed bb, does laundry, make tea, does hshold chores, make lunch, feed bb, does chores, make tea, bathe bb, take shower, make dinner, feed bb..
In short, she makes sure I'm never hungry, as she say 'wind' will get into me if hungry, and she takes care of bb day-night.

3. her cooking is good fabulous and cos I've only vege food, she can cook whatever we have, and even suggest what we can buy, & remind us what to replenish. Heard frm my colleagues she can cook non-veg equally good..even their older children like her cooking, and very willing to share her recipe with them.

4. she'll take care of everything, generous and kind by nature..very simple, and I don't have to worry anything..only I seldom..hardly napped, she'd remind me to rest..to take my shower..to take my meals..my herbal soup, even ask me if i mind her answering HP while carrying bb..

5. doesn't eat much, and only like hot spicy food..makes sure i've got enough ginger..

6. doesn't nap during day..only recreation is watch TV drama serials

7. takes initiative to help out during bb 1st mth buffet bash..making the red eggs the night before, and in the kitchen, carrying and taking care of bb, cleaning up the whole place after everyone left..we were all so tired we didn't hear bb cry dat night..and even helped me to unwrap the presents..

8. reminded me to prepare bb new clothes to wear on 1st mth, change our bedsheets..and get me BIG pail of bath water to shower before bb 1st mth..

9. suggested my hubby to get me top quality 'chong cao' to provide nutrients for my body..and to get for bb necessities..we've overlooked..

10. she'll explain why she's doing things the way she does..so no misunderstanding..good comm. Eg. she closes bedrm door when sleep..not using gauze napkins before we bought the diaper liners.

11. open-minded. she does the washing the way I corrected her..not to use FUZZY, but use 'QUICK WASH' instead, saves water, time..

20 Things to note for buffet catering at home for bb 1st month

(A) Drinks
1. if you've big water container, can mix own orange syrup, and a smaller one for plain water.
2. make a few bags (using small clear plastic bags, those for take away food carriers, half filled with water) of ice 1-2 days in advance.
3. have someone in-charge to make say, coffee if your guests prefer hot beverage
4. have big thermal flask of hot water ready.

(B) Food
5. order more veg if your guests prefer greens to mock meat.
6. have someone in-charge of replenishing food say, pan-fried veg spring rolls, pan-fried samosa, mini buns for snacks, pan-fried pototoes in case you need to top up the veg curry etc

7. have someone in-charge of the buffet table table say, keep the fuel burning to keep food warm, see if the cold drinks needs to be topped up..
8. have someone in-charge of the disposables eg. plates, cups, chopsticks, spoons, dessert spoons, bowls etc and the trash bags.

(C) Others
9. have someone in-charge of keeping the angbaos and writing down the names of the ppl giving so you've record for future reference.
10. have someone in-charge of carrying and showing off your bb
11. have someone in-charge of taking photos of all guests w bb, together with their gifts..some don't write names on the big presents..
12. have someone in-charge of entertaining the guests, show them around, find the washroom..and see to the guests' needs eg. fans, air-con..
13. have someone in-charge of running to the nearest supermarket to get food if need..
14. have someone in-charge of serving you and byran food and drinks..you maybe too tired and bz to go find food..

Weight gain during pregnancy

1. Target. Everyday while you are pregnant in the third trimester, you need 200 calories more.

2. Meals. If you don't replenish your energy supply regularly, you'll find yourself low on energy and even light-headed.

3. Weight control. Focus on your target weight goal in mind instead of week-to-week, or month-to-month.

4. Lifestyle. Stay active, eat moderately and be careful not to gain too much weight in pregnancy.

5. Calories. When dining out, avoid supersized portions eg. buffets and other excessive meal deals & don't calories.

6. Vegetables. They supply you and baby with extra nutrients and fibre and prevent constipation.

Pregnancy A-Z for first trimester

1. Bodily changes. Even though the body has changed very little from the outside this early in your pregnancy, huge changes are taking place within.

2. Folate and folic acid. Even before you are pregnant, while you are still trying to conceive, increase your intake of folate or take folic acid supplement.

3. Nature. 1 in 5 embryos miscarries very early. If possible, take heart in the fact that imperfect embryos miscarry spontaneously.

4. Maximise development. This period offers you the chance to maximise your baby's development, along with your own health, through your diet and lifestyle.

5. Nauseous. Severe nausea (cause ~10% body weight loss) or a total lack of nausea are not causes for concern. Both conditions still produce healthy babies.

6. Combat nausea. Eating little and often, grazing on the "white diet" or consuming fresh or crystallized ginger can help combat nausea (more tiredness results in more nausea).

Pregnancy A-Z for third trimester

1. Keep up the good habits. Minimise discomforts and maximise yours and your baby's health by continuing to lead a healthy lifestyle and eat a good diet.

2. Nearing the end. You may often be uncomfortable now, but the strong foetal movements you are feeling mean your pregnancy is reaching its natural conclusion.

3. Nutritional resources. Your baby is drawing heavily on your stores of calcium and iron. Keep your intake of these high so you do not become depleted yourself.

4. Vary your foods. Babies in the womb stick out their tongue and taste the amniotic fluid. Eat a variety of foods to introduce the baby to new tastes.

5. Normal swelling. Every pregnant women swells to some degree and it is only considered a problem if you have high blood pressure.

6. Fibre. Keep your fibre and fluid intake high now to counteract constipation and avoid haemorrhoids, which are a common problem in pregnancy.

Pregnancy A-Z for second trimester

1. Smooth sailing. Most of the early symptoms of pregnancy are nearly gone, but you may now find yourself craving chocolate, salt or fresh fruit.

2. Increased needs. Depending on the kind of activities, you now need an extra 300-500 calories daily, and increasing amounts of calcium and iron.

3. Exercise caution. Be very careful when exercising, to avoid falling and hitting your abdomen. Avoid skiing, horse riding, rollerblading, rope skipping and contact sports.

4. Fluid intake. Staying hydrated is more important than ever to counteract constipation, feeling dizzy, light-headed, or faint, and to avoid dry skin.

5. Handling heartburn. Eat small meals often, not too close to bedtime, sleep propped up, and take an antacid tablet to help ease the sensations of heartburn.

6. Mood improvers. Depression may be reduced by consuming more omega-3 fatty acids and occasionally having a small piece of high-quality dark chocolate.

25 things to do before your little one arrives

I'm currently in my 32nd week of pregnancy, and I'd have another 7 weekends (including this week) should our little one decides to arrive earlier to celebrate Buddha's Joyful Day on the 24Aug 2010 (on the 15th day of lunar calendar). Otherwise, I'd have another 8-9 weekends should he arrive later to celebrate Bodhisattva Ksitigarbha's birthday on 7Sep 2010 (on the 30th day of the 7th month of lunar calendar).

I found the following in an article, and agree to some of the things mentioned, but not the following:
#3 & #22 - body massage may not be suitable for pregnant women, and hairdo (highlight, dye or perm) is not advisable as the chemicals enter our bodies straight to our womb where our foetus is (though there's no evidence, if you have to, better to do it in your 2nd or 3rd trimester).

#11 - spurging on jewellery is not my cup of tea

#13 - even a getaway with frens locally is difficult (as some may have to make arrangements for their young kids) to meet up if they don't wish to bring along big bags of bb stuff, bb stroller or carrier or even their spouse to take care of the kids

#21 - don't have the time to waste, as shopping and looking around for bb stuff can last only at most 2h as I tired more easily towards the 3rd trimester

#24 - it's no no for me, as heels are all left in the office (though I'd like to wear the heels I bought for our wedding again), and personally, flat shoes are more comfy, and dine at home can save up for bb future expenses instead.

1. Heart talk with hubby- voice out your expectations before and after the birth and vice versa
2. Research work- have a bb shopping checklist (first few years has gift-list services and store managers to provide assistance)
3. Relax- go for a facial, spa, body massage, manicure or hairdo
4. Keep fit- do little & often, begin with 15-min sessions, then increase up to 45-min in the 2nd trimester (walking & swimming can be done in moderation till D-day)

What to bring for admission for delivery

1. Admission Letter from doc
2. Letter of Gurantee from employer/Insurance company if any
3. NRIC
4. Passport if foreigner
5. Antenatal receipts for medisave claims (doc fees will be paid before the hospital bill upon discharge)
6. Original Marriage Cert to apply BC for NB with name chosen in advance

What to bring for the hospital stay (mainly mom's personal items)
1. Personal pyjamas (preferably front-open for breastfeeding if need)
2. Breastfeeding bra
3. Bedroom slippers
4. Sanitary towels
5. Personal toiletries and skin care if need
6. Cardigan (optional)


Bath towels, toothbrush, toothpaste will be provided.

*Preferably to prepare these items in a bag packed 2-3 weeks in advance of EDD (estimated delivery date).

Checklist of items to have for NB

A) Baby room

1. Crib / cot bed (NB-5yrs old) + bedding (fitter sheet, comforter, bosters, pillows), bumper, mattress ($30 top-up for firm mattress). $348 @Spring Maternity & Baby AMK HUB  (52" x 28")

2. Blanket (IKEA)

3. 3-5 sets of NB clothes (gloves, socks, pyjamas, handkerchiefs etc) (Online retailer of Organic and BPA free products, baby clothes etc Pure-rest & EcoBaby Organics (optional))

4. Leg warmers (optional)

5. Baby changing mat

6. NB Disposable Diapers (Pampers if on promotion / Pet Pet ~5kg / Mamy Poko or ) / baby napkins (Pureen 12 pc UP $22.35 SP $17.88)

7. Baby wipes (Pigeon, Kodomo Baby) (avoid those that dry / irritate skin) (optional)

8. Cotton balls

9. Diaper / nappy rash / protective ointment or cream

10. Air-purifier (optional)

11. Baby toys (Taf Toys Baby Bowling Set @Isetan, Robinsons, OG kidzloft) (optional)

12. waterproof mat for cot w cotton top (optional)

13. NB-to-Toddler Portable Rocker (Fisher-Price) (optional)

B) Feeding

1. Feeding bottles for milk (2 bottles 4oz and 1 bottle 9oz for 0-3mth) and water (Avent-Philip BFA-free bottles Philips)

2. Sterilising kit (Avent-Philip Digital / Electric)

3. Thermo flasks w hot water

4. Milk powder (optional) small tin for trial. Eg. Similac, Nan, Frisco

5. Healtheries Goats milk powder NZ (optional) for better digestion. $24.20 for a tin of 450g (correct as at 9 Jun 2010).

6. Pacifiers w peg (optional)

7. Baby bibs (optional)

C) Bathroom toiletries

1. Baby shower tub

2. Baby body wash $10.20 (Melaleuca)

3. Baby hair wash $10.20 (Melaleuca) (optional)

4. Baby bath towels

5. Baby oil (optional)

D) Outdoors

1. Stroller (for NB steadier/heavier ones recommended. Eg. Amigo from Germany $380.70 UP $430+ / Pre Perego from Italy $600+)

2. Carrier (Baby Bjorn) $299 at Kiddy Palace (Promo 15% discount for non-members; 20% for members correct as at 13 Jun 2010)

3. Storage Bags / Bags for carrying baby stuff (Baby bibs, handkerchiefs, Disposable Diapers for changing w nappy rash cream, Baby wipes etc)

4. Milk bottle bag + feeding bottles + Milk powder

5. Thermal flask w hot water

6. water bottle

7. clean set of clothes for change (optional)

8. Car seat (optional)

9. Hand sanitizer (Melaleuca) (optional)

E) Before Day of delivery

a) For Mum's Confinement / feeding:

1. To find confinement nanny + pay deposit 6mth before EDD (optional)

2. To find infant nanny / care centre (<18mth) after confinement (optional)

3. maid / part-time domestic helper (optional)

4. Breastpump @Kiddy Palace Medela Mini Electric plus $244.50 UP $305.60 (Promo 15% discount for non-members; 20% for members correct as at 13 Jun 2010)  (optional)

5. Breastpump bag + cooler bag (optional)

6. Nipple cream (optional)

7. Stretch mark cream (optional)

8. Nursing pillow (Little-Bud) (optional)

b) For Mum's bath:

1. old ginger

2. herbal sachets

c) For Mum's closet:

1. Waist band (optional after Natural birth delivery)

2. Nursing bras + pads

3. Nursing blouses / dresses (optional)

d) For Mum's diet:

1. red dates

2. 2 thermo flasks (for red dates + dried longan drink)

3. oats for breakfast

4. Mianxian for meals

5. Mixed nuts for snacks

6. confinement tonics / wine Eg. Dome (optional)

7. old ginger (to stir fry fine strips for garnish)

F) Day of delivery - call hubby / cab (optional)

Bag to bring to hospital upon contractions (every 10min) / bursting of water bag containing:

1. Handbag (wallet containing IC and personal belongings eg. mobile & charger, digital camera & charger)

2. Thermo flask (optional)

3. Mum's maternity pads & old underwear (optional)

4. Mum's clean set of clothes & toiletries (towels may be provided)

5. NB towel

6. NB overall (optional)

7. Send SMSes to friends/relatives to inform of baby’s arrival

8. Call confinement nanny to inform of baby’s arrival (optional)

G) Others

1. Cord Blood banking Eg. Stemcord, Cordlife, S'pore Cord Blood Bank

2. Life plan for NB (PruFirst Gift for Mum2Be and unborn child. Don HP: 92338293)

3. Savings account for NB

4. Pre-natal ($60 for 90min / Post-natal massage $60-65 for 90min (Maya Mummy Massage / Sutera Touch / ssalmiah@yahoo.com.sg) (optional)

5. Photo shoot (dphoto folio studio / Sean Lau Baby Photo /The Studio Loft / White Room Studio) (optional)

6. Handprints / Footprints portrait (bestimprezzione.com / Beijing Ai Xin Muying Service International PL) (optional)

7. Baby shower cakes (Sweetest Moments / Baby Bliss / Le Precious / My Jolly Town PL) / Bengawan Solo cake vouchers / buffet (optional)

8. Cooling Patch (to put on forehead when child is unwell) (optional)

9. Woodwards Gripe Water (to drink when child is unwell) (optional)

10. Baby swimming Program (0-12mth) (Baby Spa / Beijing Ai Xin Muying Service International PL) (optional)

11. NB First Haircut (w/in 30-60 days) (Beijing Ai Xin Muying Service International PL)